I ♥ Music

Saturday, August 16, 2008,5:30 AM

numb

the more i live, the more I realize how life's too dark to live in. I just want to be in something where i am not alive nor dead. Maybe souless. emotionless. Just existing without the thought of it.

I don't know if I am just too blinded by how hazy i see my life's turning out. Constant miseries and anger build up in me that choosing not to care seems to be as easy as staring at a blank space. I'm too overwhelm by the bliss of being numb that happiness seems too dull to be overindulge in.

Labels: thoughts

Sunday, July 20, 2008,6:34 AM

Para lang may deviation

This is called 35 FIRST REACTIONS.
-Type what comes to your mind first.
-Doesn't matter how random.
1. Beer: MORG
2. Food: MELAY
3. Relationships: I NEED
4. Your CRUSH: TANGA
5. Power Rangers: JC SUKA BOY
6. Life: NOT EASY
7. Death: LOLA
8. School: FISHER VALLEY
9. The President: MALIIT
10. Yummy: GUMMY BEARS.. KATUNOG E KAHIT DI NAMAN XA YUMMY TALAGA
11. Cars: CHEV
12. Movie: LITTLE MANHATTAN
13. Halloween: PANIC AT THE DISCO
14. Sex: SESAME STREET. BAKET KAYA??

(bat kaya 35? e 14 lang naman? hahahah)

Labels: survey

,5:13 AM

harrased and so i cried

My kikomachine komix 2 was harrased by my sister's dormmate. She gave it back to me earlier when we dropped her to pisay dorm. "ito na, kaso may tiklop saka dumi". I looked at it and got furious. "ano??!! alam mo bang collectibles to!! (kahit hindi)". I didn't get mad at her,I was angry at the self-centered brat who borrowed my beloved KMK2 without permission.

Salty water came out from my eyeballs, and I can't help it. I don't know why my body has to do such dramatic scene but it felt so good. It's been ages since I last cried. It was then that I realized how much I value those things that I once thought was just piled papers with bunch of scribbles that makes me laugh hard. Surprise surprise, it was more than that to me.

It was my escape, well aside from time to time day dreaming, from the dental torture and all that jazz. I know it's too late but I hate my course. I dont like to be a dentist. I mean it. "subalit, hindi ko hilig magduktor, sana maintindihan mo...".But then again, in a positive christian side, why would God place me here when He knows it is here I will suffer?.. err I will excel? (please I don't want to read nor hear another supporting message, such as "kaya mo yan! tuloy mo lang dent! aja!". I dont care anymore.)

Sufferings are part of life. God didn't said that life would be easy so basically I can't blame Him. So who shall I blame now? martyrs? fantasies? high goals? UP???anyone willing to be blamed??

GAH!! Before we went home, my mom talked to my sister. Her bastard dormmate has to replace my KMK2. I don't want her to feel guilty but then again I don't want to tolerate such self-centered act. I shall exercise my komix's rights against abusive readers! Besides, it's one of the few things that makes me happy now and P120 isn't cheap anymore. lalalalalalalalalala

Labels: experience, kiko machine komix, thoughts

Friday, April 11, 2008,2:23 AM

boring days bring back memories

After reading our past conversations, I realized that it was all my fault. I didn't expect we'll turn out this way. I should have never told you a thing. It was never meant to happend, it just spilled. Intentionally and accidentally. By now I guess I'm the only one feeling this way and doing such to feel this way.

We used to talk like adhd kids. There were times when we dont even say a word yet we conversed. Talk about autistics. We use to share things without being hesitant like when the time I had a date with a friend and you were shocked. It was on the avatar space, one of the plugin features in ym. I even had a picture from print screen + paste taken by my friend. You argued why I didn't took our pic when we did that. I reckoned with a bobo msg that I didn't have a printscreen key in my keyboard. HAHAHAHA. You said all have printscreen key and I checked. There you go. Really, I thought I didn't have one. In the almost end, one must say, "Those we're the days."

Now, we barely converse. I guess we just ran out of nonsense topics. Everything seems to be senseful afterall. Especially after that one incident. Kaboom. History has taken its place. I just hope we'll be friends again. Just like what ruffa mae said, "Birds of the same feather make a good feather duster".

Goodbye. Goodbye. Parting. Is. Such. A. Sweet. Sorrow. That. I. Shall. Say. Goodnight. Till. It. be. Morrow.

Labels: memory

Tuesday, April 8, 2008,1:27 AM

legally panext

It is one day after the official 1 month before my birthday comes. In this case, it's my debut. People are expecting me to have one, especially now, it's getting sooner and sooner. (scream here). After seeing the debuts that I have attended for the past year, I have decided that I won't be having one anymore. Don't get me wrong. Their parties were great but I don't see myself in a thousand pesos gown smiling and sitting in front of my guests while they are eating, taking pictures and laughing their hearts out without me.

But I think a debut would be the best time to gather all my friends in one room. Such thing only happens in dreams, though I haven't dreamt of it yet or maybe I will. Or maybe not. I feel so excited just imagining it. What more if it's really happening??

Since it's summer, my mom decided that why not have a swimming party. The place is actually great but it's within the army place near the santolan station of MRT. My mom said we'll get good discount if we held it there for some reason that i won't tell anymore because it's not important and im too tired to explain. I asked about 4friends before and they agreed with it.

Although a few weeks after that, for some reason I don't recall, I told my mom I don't like to pursue with it. I have the feeling that it's because I got lazy planning and I lost the paper where the food prices were listed. I love my friends and I don't want hassle them with the preparation for my birthday. I think they will also not go because they feel lazy. Ok, my excuses are lame.

After writing all my thoughts down, I feel like it would be better not to think of it anymore. Come what may. Besides, my bestfriend didn't have a celebration either. Better go with her influence. In addition, there is some sort of bad luck that runs in the maternal family wherein those who held their debuts got married at a very young age.

Labels: thoughts

Friday, February 29, 2008,7:17 AM

MOrg Love

This was my first ever major event of Morg that I attended. Why? because exams always ruin everything. They go schedule themselves the next morning of MOrg events. But this time, I made myself have amnesia. Test are just pain in the ass and (if ever) missing MOrg love will be my official greatest regret for the school year considering that I will be a proper dent soon. So for those who didn't attend MOrg love... tsktsk you have missed the ever so fantastic, fun, eargasmic, and unforgettable prom you'll ever had. hahaha

The place was great, the food was delicious, the live bands (though some are not that prom-like) were all amazing, the dancing was fun, I guess the games was exciting (I wasn't able to watch and join it cause I already went home at 10), the giftpacks are awesome, and the hard rockin' YAKULT was the best! Imagine yakult/ morg mix for P10! whoaw!

I saw lots of people even from some frats, indayog, various courses. Hands down to Morg. Yey! and yeah for the first time, Jorron became an active member again hahaha great.

For pictures and videos see my multiply. http://sillygameweplay.multiply.com

Labels: experience

Thursday, February 28, 2008,2:37 AM

The day before MOrg Love

I woke up just the right time for me to be able to go to stores in our place to find a vial. With much luck that I can get, I wasn't able to buy single piece. When I got to Manila, I immediately went to the mercury drugstore. I asked for a vial and they gave me a fecal cup. Ok that will be very useful but not for now. I need a vial!!

I went to school just before 10am for my chem lecture. I sat down as I was very exhausted with all those vigorous walking I did. (Fats goodbye!) I asked Marc if he has a vial already and with a shock face he answered,"ha?? kelangan ba?". Yes, I'm not alone! He decided to buy the vial right away. I said Ill rest for awhile. I dont want to kill myself and besides Robinson's was still closed.

As we don't really understand a thing in our chem lecture, we decided not to attend the class anymore. We walked to the national bookstore and passed by Breadtalk. My hypothalamus was on hype. I was so hungry. And so after we bought the three P6.25 vial for me, him, and chi, we ate at the breadtalk. We bought a circular bigger than ensaymada pizza, which was so delicious, and a pancake with cream cheese filling, which tasted like a chiffon mediocre. It has been a long time since I bought my self for a yummy and expensive treat.

Officially, the first class that I attended was chem lab. Though it has always been exhausting, I enjoyed every minute of it. My lab classmates are fun to be with add to that the two LAB partners, bert and andong who has always made me laugh till I drop. As in drop to the ground, with teary eyes, and red face.

For their episode today, they had a heart-to-heart talk. They were finished with their work and was talking side-by-side quietly. It was such a funny scene as i was thinking that they were discussing if it was ok for andong's parents if robert would come to fetch him.

I told it to chi-chi and added to the story that robert will fetch andong to go to MOrg Love. Andong will be wearing a barong tagalog and robert a big ball gown with cotton on his nose to cover the peeping nose hairs.

Labels: experience